


Sorry it took so long

by Tickettohell



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Character Development, DICE (dangan ronpa) - Freeform, Friends to Lovers, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mental Health Issues, POV Third Person, Slow Burn, keebo is a human too, switching POV, teens being teens and having a sexuality crisis, they are still written in character tho, those two aren’t explicit tho, you have entered the headcanon zone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 07:14:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23847286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tickettohell/pseuds/Tickettohell
Summary: If you lie well enough your expressions will become a maskIf they see through your lie's than they can take off that maskKokichi hid the truth while Shuichi would search for itBoth of them too much of a realist to believe in fate, however it seemed the two were perfect to go hand in hand with each otherif only it were simpleAfter a series of events Kokichi and Shuichi stumble into each other lives and overcome their own struggles alone and together.It might start off a bit cliché but give it a chance
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 23
Kudos: 129





	1. The plan

Kokichi sped down the high school halls, shoes squeaking angrily on the smooth floor. The sound of larger footsteps grew intensely from behind. That sound came from Momota Kaito, who was angrily yelling as he chased the smaller boy through the corridors. Kokichi had apparently gone to far when annoying the other after class today and thus started the ridiculous chase sequence which was being played out.

It was actually common routine. Not many weeks went by without a scuffle between them. Usually Kokichi found Gokuhara in time and hid behind him. Gokuhara would calm the situation while Kokichi would flash a smug grin at Momota, clutching onto his body guards arm like an annoying younger sibling hiding behind their parent. 

Today however Gokuhara would still be in his entomology class so Kokichi would either have to outmanuver his chaser or find someone else to calm the furious Momota. Luckily kokichi was quite fast despite his size. He managed to reach the end of the corridor before the other could catch up. It was then he saw a blue haired boy dressed in all black. 

Kokichi immediately recognised him. It was Saihara Shuichi. A boy in his year. They hadn’t interacted much but they knew of each other from here and there conversations. Momota being one of the boys' friends.

“SAIHARA!” Kokichi screamed dramatically, failing and running towards the other boy. “HELP MEEE!”

\------

Shuichi jumped in his skin and before he could process what was happening, the small boy rushing towards him ducked, hiding behind him.

Next Momota came barraling around the corner and stopped aduptly at the sight of his best friend. He caught eyes with Oma, peaking out from behind Shuichi who stood there rather awkwardly, and glared at him.

Shuichi was very aware of Momota’s and Oma’s spats. Why haven’t either of them learnt their lesson by now he wondered vaguely.

“What happened this time,” Shuichi began in deadpan voice. Despite seeing this occur before he’d never been put into the middle of their fights before. God where was Gokuhara.

“He’s been an annoying brat all morning and he put vinegar in my coffee.” Mamota accused, aggressively pointing at the small boy who was still using Shuichi as a human barrier.

“I thought you’d see me doing it, I wasn’t exactly subtle.” Oma retorted, checking his nails.

The two proceeded bickering with Shuichi trapped in the middle. The only similarity between Momota and Oma was the pigment of their hair. Their personalities however clashed like toothpaste and orange juice, or coffee and vinegar.

“You shouldn’t have done it in the first place you-“ Momota began.

“It’s not something to beat me up over, geeeez.” Oma interrupted.

“I wasn’t goin’ to beat you up!”

“Then what _were_ you gonna do huuuh?”

“I dunno, make you buy me another damn coffee.”

Shuichi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. It was too early in the morning for this.

“Momota, I’ll buy you another coffee.” Shuichi finally said, making the other two quiet.

“No way man, you shouldn’t have to spend money because of that asshole.” Momota shot another glare at Oma.

Oma stuck his tongue out childishly in response.

“If it’ll stop whatever...this is,” shuichi sighed, making a gesture around him. “Than I really don’t care.”

Momota refused again but he’d seemed to have calmed down. Telling the other two he was going to catch up with 'makiroll', Mamota angrily stomped away. Shuichi agreed with him to meet later. He needed to find Keade first.

He waved Mamota off and turned to Oma who was scuffing his feet across the floor. He didn’t really know what to say. The shorter boy was considered ‘the weird kid’ by many people in their year and was said to have a habit for lying so much that it was one of his signature traits. Despite that shuichi couldn’t just walk away without saying anything, right? That’d be weird, wouldn’t it?

Shuichi decided to be blunt and ask, “Why did you put vinegar in Mamota's coffee?”

Oma shrugged with a sad expression, “He looked down today so I thought he’d catch me trying to do it and it’d cheer him up. I didn’t have any bad intentions you know.”

Shuchi wasn’t convinced. “You must have known how he was going to react, it’s not like this is the first time you’ve made him mad by pulling a prank on him.”

“Then maybe I was just bored, who knows, nishishi.” Ouma laughed, holding a finger to his lips.

Oma also had a strange signature laugh. Harukawa had said how she finds it annoying but to Shuichi it was...something.

“Okay whatever, just...stay safe okay? I don’t want to be in that awkward situation again. See you.” Shuichi said and turned to leave.

As he was walking down the corridor he heard fast footsteps approaching behind him. Oma appeared at his side. 

“Wait, I forgot to thank you for being my knight in shining armour!” Kokichi laughed clutching his hands together dramatically, like a maiden in distress.

“Huh?”

“Or basically being my meat shield so Momota didn’t pummel me.” Oma shrugged.

“Oh you’re welcome? Also I don’t think Momota’s that dangerous.”

“So,” Oma prompted, “where’re we going?”

“We? Well I’m going to meet up with Kaede.” Shuichi responded.

“Ohh Akamatsu? That your girlfriend?” Oma said teasingly.

“N-no.” Shuichi faltered.

“Really? But you two call each other by your first names.”

“Momota calls me by my first name.”

Oma grinned, “maybe he wants a piece of you toooo.”

Shuichi huffed in responsed and tried to walk faster, However Oma matched foot with him and kept to his side like a small dog.

“Oma, do you need something?” Shuichi asked, turning to the other boy. 

“Nope! In fact this is where we part ways...for now.” And with his signature laugh Oma left as quickly as he arrived.

\------

Shuichi sat twidling his thumbs at the table. Lunch had rolled around and he and his friends sat and conversed at the same table they always do. It was only himself, Kaede, Momota, and Harukawa. Amami would sometimes join them. It seemed that he was welcomed at any table he sat at.

He was near the beginning of his second year at Hopes Peak Academy, and everyone had fallen comfortably into their respective roles and routines. Shuichi was kind of adopted into his group of friends by the two extroverts Kaede and Momota. Although he wasn’t the most sociable he’d spoken to everyone in his main course classes at least once.

“You alright Shuichi?” Keade asked. “You’ve been staring off into space.”

“Huh? Oh yeah sorry. What are you guys talking about?” Shuichi snapped out of his daydream.

“Our favourite kinds of spaceships” Momota said.

“No, we weren’t and we’re not going to.” Harukawa deadpanned receiving a disappointed ‘awwe’ from Mamota. 

“What we were actually talking about is Tojo kirumi’s party.” Kaede said, wiggling her shoulders excitedly.

“Kirumi is throwing a party?” Shuichi questioned. Man he was really out of the loop.

“Yeah,” answered Kaede, “and we’re all invited. How great is that?”

Oh a high school party. Something Shuichi wouldn’t want to touch with a ten foot pole if he was honest. 

“Oh...yeah.” He managed.

“You don’t sound too thrilled.” Momota said.

“Uh, I’m just not a big fan of party’s.” He left out the detail that he’d never been to one either.

“Me neither,” said Harukawa, pointing to Mamota, “although I promised to this idiot I’d go to at least one.”

“Shuichi, you don’t have to come if you don’t want to, but it’d be more fun if you did.” Keade said.

“Ah, um, I’ll see.” He said.

\------

Kokichi sat picking at his food in the spot that he and his...acquaintance had adopted. 

Speaking of, the two idiots were already arguing. Iruma Miu spouting her usual profanities and Idabashi Keebo getting worked up over probably nothing. Eventually Kokichi couldn’t hear his own thoughts over the noise.

“What the fresh hell are you idiots even arguing about?” He asked, annoyed.

They both tuned to him.

“Iruma thinks we should sneak into Tojo kirumi’s party.” Keebo began.

“Well I won’t be sneaking in because I’ll be invited for sure! I mean who could resist this?” She gestured to herself for impact.

The two boys stared, unimpressed.

“Literally, everyone.” Kokichi deadpanned.

“Ugh, well of course a homo like you is gonna say that.” Iruma accused, flicking her hair.

“Hey if I was gay, it’d probably be because I spend time with a gross slut like you. Anywaaays, we’re getting sidetracked,” Kokichi huffed, rolling his eyes and ignoring Irumas whimpers. “Of course we’re sneaking into the party.”

Keebo scoffed “You too? Well you guys have fun then.”

“Nuh-uh! you’re coming with us!” Kokichi replied.

Keebo frowned. “Do I have a say in the matter?”

“No!” Iruma and Kokichi said together.

Keebo knew they wouldn’t do anything if he just didn’t show up. The two just have a weird way of communicating the message ‘we want you to be there’. And to be fair none of the three has any remarkable communication skills, which is probably what drew them together. 

“So, we’ll go over the game plan tonight in my dorm. Be there or be square.” Kokichi concluded.

\------

It was late Friday evening in Kokichi's dorm room. Keebo and Iruma sat on two worn beanbags as kokichi wheeled up a huge white board. On it was a crudely drawn image of what appeared to be a house layout with random notes and labels scribbled around it.

“What the fuck is this bullshit.” Began Iruma.

“Quiet bitch! I’m trying to give a presentation here,” kokichi snapped, gesturing to the board with a ruler. “Now this is a layout of kirumi Tojo's huge ass house. And the fact it’s so big gives us an advantage. Since there’s more room to fit more guests we have a bigger chance of sneaking in unspotted.”

“Are you some kind of tard? Tojo's gonna have some shit head watching the door.” Iruma interjected.

“Interrupting! If you’d let me finish I would’ve explained that. Now shut your whore mouth and let me continue.” Kokichi shot back.

Iruma whimpered and hung her head. Keebo rolled his eyes, sighing.

“We’re not gonna go through the door. Our best entrance is the window." Kokichi said, slapping the ruler onto the diagram to indicate it's location. "However I scoped out the area and it turns out kirumi’s house is on a porch so even the first floor window is gonna be sorta high up.”

“Wait, you went loitering around her house?” Keebo asked.

“No she invited me round to get friskyyy~.” Kokichi grinned, “I’m kidding. It was much easier to get a look on google maps.”

Keebo frowned. “That- that doesn’t explain how you had her address.” 

“That’s a _seeecret_.” Kokchi put a finger to his lips. “And also not important right now. Anyways, we can get through the window by giving each other boosts and then pulling the last person through. However we already need someone on the other side to make sure the window’s open...”

Keebo and Iruma both raised an eyebrow.

“Which is why we need to ask someone on the inside to be our accomplice... and I have the perfect person.” He grinned evilly.

Kokichi stared expectingly at the two.

“Are you not gonna ask who?” He said, frowning.

Iruma scoffed. “The fuck, you got mad last time I interrupted!”

“I was obviously promoting you- ugh whatever. It’s Saihara Shuichi.” Kokichi announced.

“You mean that emo kid? Blue hair, always looks awkward?” Iruma asked.

”correctamundo!”

The girl laughed obnoxiously. “Yeah the guy looks like a _total_ masochist. I bet he’d crawl like a dog if I asked him to!”

“You’re one to talk. You look like you cream yourself every time I talk down to you.” Kokchi accused.

“Hhh, w-with y-your hight you’re not talking down to anyone!” she stuttered back.

“I’m not getting involved.” Keebo said raising his hands as the two began arguing. He sipped his drink with an expression on his face that read ‘I am so done with these two’.

\------

It was late in the night and Shuichi was lay on his back staring up. The moonlight seeped through the blinds, painting his ceiling in a series of lines. 

He was grateful that it was the weekend tomorrow meaning he’d be able to lie in and actually get some some sleep.

His mind wondered to the party next week. It took place on the last day of the term and everyone would be returning to their homes for the holidays the day after. It would be a good way to see everyone off, but the thought of being somewhere he’d never been before with people he didn’t know well filled him with a queasy unease.

However he wouldn’t be alone. His friends would be there and he knew they wouldn’t leave him by himself if he was nervous. 

But what if he couldn’t handle it and had to leave. What if he freaked out in front of everyone. He’d upset them all. He'd let them all down. He wanted to go but should he?

His thoughts were interrupted by the heavy vibration of his phone on the bedside table.

Squinting in pain as his eyes adjusted to the bright light of his phone screen, Shuichi strained to see the notification.

It was a text from an unknown number.

**Unknown:** heeey saiharaaa＼(^_^ )

**Unknown:** Oh this is Oma kokichi btw ~(˘▾˘~)

Oma? Shuichi had no idea what the boy wanted at, he glanced at the time. 2am? Shuichi answered after changing oumas contact name.

**Me: Hi what’s up?**

**Oma:** I’m trapped in the supply closet and I need you to get the key

**Me:** what?? 

**Oma:** That was just a lie! I’ve actually been arrested and I need you to bail me out!! 

**Me:** sure...

**Oma:** Nishishi just kidding again i just wanted to ask you something

**Me:** is that a laugh?? Also what do you want? 

**Oma:** Yes it IS my laugh (ง’̀-‘́)ง you’re going to Tojo's party right?

Shuichi thought on his answer. He still wasn’t sure. How did Oma even know that he had been invited.

**Me:** Uh maybe

**Oma:** maybee?

-—-

Kokichi lay on his side, dry eyes staring at his phone and thinking. If Saihara didn’t go then he’d have to find someone else. Which wouldn’t be too much of a hassle. He’d only selected saihara as he was reminded of the boys existence from the chase with Momota in the day.

Kokichis phones buzzed.

**Saiharara:** uh I haven’t decided yet

**Me:** (゜-゜) how come

**Saiharara:** I’m not great with parties

Kokchi really couldn’ve just said ok and left it but a part of him wanted to see Saihara there. The guy seemed just fun to tease.

**Me:** awee it won’t be as fun with out youuu (╥_╥)

**Saiharara:** hah sure

**Me:** I’m kidding. The party’s gonna be the best because I’ll be there (｀∀´)Ψ

**Me:** Is what I would say if I had been invited nishishi 

**Saiharara:** oh if you wanna go i could ask keade to ask kirumi 

A part of him wanted Saihara to go. He'd be able to get to know him better, but there was no way he was gonna be straight up honest about that.

**Me:** There’s no use she told me I’d be too troublesome nishishi

**Saiharara:** wait didn’t you want to ask something 

**Me:** I WAS gonna ask you to sneak me through the window nishishi but it’s kinda pointless now

**Saiharara:** well I might go it’s just I’m scared of going??

Kokichi was a little surprised that saihara hadn’t seemed phased by sneaking in an unwanted guest. He guessed something else was on the other boys mind.

**Me:** scared? Well you should be! All those people staring at you and judging you! Definitely not going to be too busy focusing on themselves and their friends to even acknowledge you! You’re gonna the centre of attention!!

\------

Shuichi could practically feel the sarcasm leaking off that text. He replied.

**Me:** I know you’re lying and I know I’m being irrational 

**Oma:** Of course I’m lying! I’m the one that’s gonna be centre of attention (・｀ω´・)

Shuichi smiled at that. He didn’t know how but Oma, in his own weird way, actually helped Shuichi feel better about the situation. Even if he just wanted Shuichi to come to help sneak him in. But he could’ve just asked someone else right?

Well whatever the reason was, Shuichi thought, he felt a bit better. That was what mattered to him right now.

**Me:** Hey Oma 

**Me:** Im going go to the party


	2. The time to kill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a short-ish and filler-ish chapter before the party. Kokichi and Shuichi bonding time and Shuichi being the CEO of overthinking.

The party was in a few days. 

Shuichi and Oma had been texting frequently. Mainly just Oma sending nonsensical sentences and Shuichi trying to decipher them. It was a small yet new and refreshing thing to his daily life.

Oma had also added Shuichi to a group chat with his two friends Iruma and Keebo, as the he claimed it would make it easier to communicate on the night of the party. Shuichi hadn’t talked much in it but he was granted an insight to Omas friend group and to say the least it was, interesting. 

Iruma would get kicked almost daily for sending R rated images, most of the texts were her and Oma ‘arguing’, and Keebo would reply to almost everything with extremely outdated memes.

It was early evening and Shuichi was planning notes to an essay when there was a knock at his door. He assumed it was most likely Momota, as he’d occasionally come round to drag the tired boy off to the gym.

“You can come in.” He said, voice raised slightly to combat the barrier of the door.

The door opened, however instead of kaito he was greeted by a laugh he could easily distinguish, he turned his head to meet Omas wide grin. He was carrying a laptop under his arm.

“Betcha thought it was someone else.” The smaller boy said, closing the door behind him.

Shuichi sat awkward at his desk, “Uhh yeah, to be honest. Why are you here, Oma?”

“Ohh just thought I’d stop by, nice place you got here, I dig the dark atmosphere.”

“You do?” Shuichi asked.

Oma giggled, “who knooows, anyway, to business.” He held out his laptop. It was covered in an assortment of faded stickers.

“Uh make yourself at home I guess,” shuichi said deadpanned, as Oma had already made his way in and plonked himself down on the others bed. “Ah, but seriously, why are you here?”

“I’m getting to that,” Oma said opening his laptop and swivelling it around so the screen faced shuichi. Upon it was a house layout.

The taller boy span his chair around to face Oma and the screen.

“I thought I’d discuss the plan with you in person! ‘cause ya know texting it out would just be booring.” Oma said taking a breath and then, before Shuichi could protest, began an exaggerated explanation of his plan.

———

“Anywaay, just make sure Tojo Kirumi doesn’t catch you or she’ll probably send your ass to the shadow realm.” Oma concluded, pointing at Shuichi.

“The what?” Shuichi asked.

Oma raised an eyebrow “What? It’s a YuGiHo reference, duh.” 

“Oh,” shuichi rubbed the back of his neck, “I haven’t seen it.” 

Oma raised both of his eyebrows. “You haven’t WHAT? Omigod, that is unforgivable we have to watch at least one episode.”

“Huh? It’s that big of a deal?” 

“Absolutely!” Oma gestured for Shuichi to come over. 

He obliged and sat stiffly next to the smaller boy on the bed. Oma was pulling up a video and soon the soundtrack of an anime filtered from the laptops tinny speakers. 

“Get confortable.” Oma said, snatching up one of Shuichis throw blankets, wrapping it around him like a cape.

How did this happen? Shuichi thought as he watched. How did Oma act more comfortable in his room than Shuichi himself. He was watching anime with a guy from his dorms, that he agreed to help sneak into a party. Ok that wasn’t really weird, this is how people make friends, right? He thought further, would he ever consider Oma a friend? Mamota and Harukawa both considered Oma a nuisance, and even Kaede didn’t have much of a liking to him, and Kaede tried to befriend everyone.

According to his friends, Oma was dramatic, childish, and a compulsive lair. But as Shuichi sat next to him, he looked at Oma, smiling and twirling a finger through a purple lock of hair, is that why the ends curled up like that, looking so immersed. Was it all a front? What was Omas deal? Shuichi tried to put his thoughts at rest by directing them towards the anime.

“Who the hell carries around a briefcase of cards?” He thought out loud.

“Ughh, where you even watching?” Oma whined.

———

Oma said one episode, but that soon turned into one more, and then that one turned into one more, until Shuichi noticed the time.

“Damn it’s 10pm, I need to finish my notes.” He said, rubbing his face. Where had the time gone, he thought.

“Ohh man, I hadn’t noticed, well I guess I have stuff to do too. Whatcha think of it though? Fun riiiight?” Oma prompted.

“Oh, yeah I actually enjoyed it, probably only...” because of you, he finished in his head. 

Banter with Oma during the anime was what Shuichi enjoyed the most, it’s how time slipped away so quickly, and how for once he didn’t feel plagued by excessive thoughts. He knew for certain he’d not get past the first episode watching the anime by himself. 

“...because I was practically forced.” He continued out loud with a small laugh.

“Hey! You weren’t forced! Actually that’s a lie I would’ve killed you if you said no!” Oma chuckled.

Shuichi gave him a look of concern.

“I’m kidding, I could never kill my beloved Saihara.” Oma smiled sweetly, although Shuichi doubted it was genuine.

Beloved? Shuichi didn’t know how to answer.

Before he could respond, Oma scooped up his laptop, throw blanket still hung as a cape around him. “My job here is done.” He announced.

“But, you didn’t do anything.” Shuichi questioned.

And with a laugh Oma swept his cape blanket dramatically and glided out the door.

Did Oma just steal his blanket?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Next chapter is gonna be the party so it’s most likely gonna be thicc  
> Feel free to let me know what you think so far


	3. The part(1)y

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't originally going to split this up but it'll be easier to section it  
> also warning that this chapter contains a small bit of underage drinking bc the characters are 17/18 but the legal drinking age in japan is 20.  
> I also had to google how common underage drinking in japan is for this  
> that being said I hope you enjoy

Shuichi stared at himself in the mirror. He met the eyes that belonged to his glass clone, and he shuddered lightly at the feeling of being seen, even if it was only by a reflection of himself. Only a couple hours to go until he would meet with his friends and finally get this party out of the way. Already dressed and prepared, he searched for his dorm key.

Opening the top draw of his cabinet, he caught eye of it. Proceeding to grab it when hr noticed what it was nestled atop of. His old cap. Jet Black, worn out, covered in dust and pencil shavings. Shuichi stared at it like he would at the sight of a murder scene. It was only last year he couldn’t go a day without it. The cap was a safety blanket. A shield to hide away from the intruding eye-line of others. 

Instinctively he reached for the hat and began dusting it off. Perhaps wearing it just to the party would quell his anxieties. The thought of all the people that would be there, all those eyes.

Eye contact was still something Shuichi struggled with. Too much emotion could be shown through eyes. Like disgust and hatred. When his eyes met another’s, then there’s nowhere for him to hide. It’s as if he’s looking right into their soul, and they’re looking back at his. Into something so deep and personal. As if looking through a lock into a person’s house. Their glare is a message of ‘I SEE YOU’. They see him, and he is thrust into the terrifying ordeal of being acknowledged. Eye contact is too much. Too intense. Too intimate. A forbidden ritual which only produced negative emotions that made him desire to sink into the nearest wall whenever he participated in it.

Shuichi noticed his thoughts spiralling and promptly brought himself back into the present. Noticing the alarming tempo of his breath he scanned the room in detail, naming things he could see, hear, and smell. He felt the edge of the cap still in his hands. The rough fabric grazing his fingertips. The dim light casting the room in dark blue hews. The almost comforting smell of carpet. The sound of the phone ringing. The phone ringing? Glancing behind him to the bed, Shuichi saw his phone light up with a name. It was Oma.

“Heeyyy my beloved Saihara,” Oma’s ever flamboyant voice flooded his ears.

“Uh, hey Oma.” Shuichi managed, having just got his breathing in check.

“You okay trooper? Sound a bit shaky there.” Oma asked.

Shuichi exhaled. “Ah, yeah, don’t worry.” 

“I won’t,” said Oma briskly, “you remember the plan? Back corner window in the living room at 8.30pm. Look sharp.”

“Yeah don’t worry I got it.”

“Okie dokie. I do owe you one, Saihara. Let me know if you bail though.” 

After a series of ‘see you laters’ he hung up.

Shuichi wasn’t exactly certain on the reason why he agreed to Oma’s plan. Perhaps it kept his mind occupied. Perhaps a part of him wanted Oma to come. Granted It would be more interesting with the mischievous boy there. He knew his friends found the short boy irritating but to Shuichi he was almost, endearing as well as frustrating. 

He’d seen a lot more of the oddball around. Oma often catching him in a conversation in the common room. Conversations that would often make Shuichi feel dizzy with the amount of back and forth Oma went with his statements. However confusing, he did find talking to liar enjoyable. Shuichi had a knack for analysing things like a person’s behaviour and thought pattern. Those years he spent as a detective’s apprentice had peaked and refined this interest. It was the reason he was studying criminology. Not that Oma was a criminal, at least to his knowledge, but trying to decipher what words of Oma’s were honest and which weren’t was to put it short, fun for him. 

Oma seemed to also hold a strange ability to make Shuichi forget his current worries and focus almost completely on him. Perhaps due to the prankster’s playful demeanour, or his perplexing words. Oma always seemed to have a game for Shuich. Whether it was a game with words or cards depended on his mood, but it kept Shuichi on his toes mentally. No matter how Shuichi would respond, Oma always seemed to have a sort of performance for it.

Pulling himself out of his inner monologue yet again, Shuichi went back to the problem at hand. Cap or no cap? He decided to compromise with the argument between himself and shoved the cap into the inside of his jacket pocket. Then if he needed it, it was there. Maybe just the thought would be enough.

———

The thought was not enough. As Shuichi looked up from the address Keade texted him to Tojo’s grand house across the street, the feeling of anxiety slithered up his spine like a serpent. With fumbling hands, he slipped out his cap and put it on. Adjusting it slightly, he felt almost instant relief from the protective barrier the front brim of his cap served. It was just for the party, until he’s comfortable, he told himself.

“Shuichi!”

Hearing Momota’s voice, he turned to see him along with Kaede and Harukawa. They were in a group sat on the edge of the pavement just a small way down from Shuichi. 

“Ah, hey guys.” He said sitting down next to Momota.

Keade, on the other end to him, leaned forward to see Shuichi. He watched her eyes dart up to his hat and back down. He saw that her expression turned downcast at the sight of it. Certain due to her knowledge of why he wore it. Kaede was the only person who knew, and the only one who prompted for him to stop wearing it. Of course she’d feel bad that he’s wearing it now. She;s probably mentally blaming herself for asking him to come. Shuichi felt a pang of guilt stab through him like a blade, a nauseating unease spreading from the wound. He hoped that Kaede would understand and not take any guilt. He made a mental note to talk to her about it later, when they were alone.

———

Tojos Kirumis house was as grand on the inside as it was on the outside, and already seemed to be packed with people, most of them swarming in a large crowd in the centre of the living room like a hive. Some Shuichi recognised, many he didn’t. He pulled the edge of his cap down a little.

“What made you wanna throw this party anyways, Tojo?” Kaede asked as they were welcomed and escorted inside by the maid in training.

“Well, my parents are away for the weekend and Chabashira Tenko requested if I could host one,” Tojo answered, her voice as elegant as always. “And I do take requests from good friends very seriously.”

“I _did_ also say that there shouldn’t be any degenerate males invited however!” Chabashira called from the kitchen, where there seemed to be less commotion.

“No need to worry. There are no degenerates here. Gokuhara graciously offered to be our bouncer for the night.” Tojo said with a soft face.

“All males are degenerates.” Chabashira muttered to herself, swinging her legs in irritation from her seat on the countertop.

———

It was 8:20pm. Shuichi had only arrived around 8:00pm, but it had felt like he’d already been here an eternity. He had stayed glued to a wall for most of that time, listening to the heavy music, and watching people half dancing, half stumbling in the centre of the floor, seemingly tipsy. Tojo had said to help themselves to food and beverages, however Shuichi felt too uneasy to eat and he’d never tried alcohol as usually it was looked down upon to drink at his age. He wasn’t even sure if there was any but it was a pretty unsupervised party so there was a chance.

His phone hummed in his pocket. Pulling it out he saw a message form Oma.

 **Oma:** heyyy is the window open?

 **Me:** on it

Momota and Harukawa had wandered off somewhere and Kaede had only briefly left to go to the restroom. This was the perfect time to open the window for Oma if his body would let him move. Somehow, he felt his legs moving by themselves towards the window. It was certainly large enough for a person to fit through. He undid the latch and pushed it open, inhaling a deep breath of air. The cool freshness of his grounded him.

———

It was 8:20pm. Across from Tojo’s house, Kokichi stood underneath a street lamp with the presence of a performer under a spotlight. He felt in his element. Iruma and Keebo had accompanied him only shortly before.

“Keeboy, what the hell are you wearing?” the illuminated boy criticized, eyeing up Keebos outfit judgingly.

“How rude! what’s wrong with my outfit?” Keebo complained, furrowing his eyebrows and gesturing to his fitted suit.

“We’re going to a party, not a fuckin’ wedding.” Iruma chimed in.

“I mean, at least he’s wearing clothes, you look like you came from a strip club.” Kokichi pointed.

“Hey! I am wearing clothes, just because I’m exposing a bit. If ya got it ya might as well flaunt it.” She cackled, pulling a pose even Kokichi would call dramatic.

Kokichi rolled his eyes “Whateveeer, just enjoy being uncomfortable in that skimpy outfit.” 

“I think you look lovely, Iruma.” Keebo smiled genuinely, adjusting his tie.

Iruma put her hands on her hips proudly “Ahh, finally the respect I deserve. You two virgins are so lucky to be graced with the presence of a beauty like me.”

“Kiss ass! you’re gonna inflate her nauseating ego if you say shit like that.” Kokichi said to Keebo, beginning to make his way across the street, Keebo trudging and Iruma strutting behind.

They had managed to sneak around the back of the house undetected by Gokuhara. Clambering over the short gate and stumbling over a rockery they came to the back door. Shadows could be seen through the frosted glass like a shadow puppet show while the faint sound of music rumbled from the walls.

“Why don’t we just enter through the back door?” Keebo whispered a suggestion.

“Because it’ll be locked for certain, and it’s way too obvious. Geez keeboy, I bet even Iruma could guess that.” Kokichi shot back.

“hey!” Iruma retorted.

Both boys shushed her aggressively in response.

“I’m pretty certain you just want to climb through the window for fun.” Keebo muttered as the posse of three continued on.

The team scurried along, arriving at the window above them. It was left wide open.

“Yeees, Saihara.” Kokichi whispered mainly to himself, turning to Keebo, “Keeboy, hoist me up.”

“Wait, I’m gonna be the hoister?” the other protested.

“Well, duh, I’m too short and Irumas too weak.” He replied.

“I’m not weak, I just don’t wanna get my hands dirty for two sweaty fuckers like you,” iruma interjected only to be shushed hastily again.

“Ugh fine, but my strength is only average.” Keebo said, squatting slighting and entwining his fingered.

Kokichi stepped on with a ‘alley-oop’ and pushed up. Keebo grunted below from the strain. Due to Oma’s height he was only eye level with the windowsill, however this gave him an opportunity to spy on the room. It looked as if the coast was clear. 

The room was long and had two sections. The majority of people seemed to be clumsily moshing in the man-made dancefloor, in the section opposite to the window. The windows side of the room seemed almost abandoned, all the attention centred on the other side most likely because it was closer to the kitchen. 

Kokichi hoisted himself up and through with cat like smoothness. He stealthily crouched, looking over the side giving Iruma and Keebo a thumbs up.

Next Iruma climbed rather ungracefully through. After brushing herself off she leaned through the window grabbing onto Keebos offered forearm below.

“Fuckin’ brat, help me pull him up.” She hissed at Kokichi.

“okay geeez…” 

They both lifted Keebo up enough for him to grab onto the sill.

“Hey!” A stern voice came from behind them.

Both Kokichi and Iruma let go of Keebos arm making him slip a little before clutching onto the sill. He let out a small panicked sound. They swivelled stiffly to see Chabashira who’s face looked like wrath itself.

“Who let these degenerates, and Iruma, sneak in.” Chabashira called, gestureing to the three, Keebo still hanging from the window awkwardly.

Kokichi scanned the room and saw an awkward blue haired boy pull his cap down. He grinned.

Tojo and Angie made their way to the scene.

“Now hold on, you don’t have to kick us out,” Kokichi began. He unzipped his bag, holding out a bottle. “I brought alcohol as I figured there wouldn’t be any.”

The three girls looked at Kokichi, then at each other, then back to him.

“Okay…you can stay. But if you do ANYTHING out of line then you’re all out,” Chabashira said, taking the bottle Kokichi handed her. “and if this is fake, I’m breaking it over your degenerate head.”

“no need to worry, I will keep an eye on him,” Tojo said, turning to Kokichi, “no trouble from any of you alright?”

“Nishishi, when have I ever caused trouble?” kokichi laughed putting his hands behind his head casually.

“where the shit did you get alcohol from you little fuckin’ gremlin? That was a ballsy move, they coulda kicked us out right then for that,” Iruma questioned after the three girls left them.

“Nishish, I know a guy” he answered, pulling out another. “Also calm your tits, it’s a party. And don’t worry I got one just between us three. Ya know, because I’m oh so generous.”

“Uh, guys?” keebo said, still hanging halfway out the window, struggling to stay in place. “A little help?”

\------

Shuichi watched as the scene with Kokichi took place. He felt a wave of relief that the other boy didn’t rat him out. 

“Hey you wanna try out the dance floor?” Keade asked after returning from the restroom. 

No, he did not want to. That was the last place he wanted to be. The dancefloor was equivalent to a mind field to him, even though he knew he was being over dramatic.

“Ah um, if you wanna dance, I can join later?” he said.

Kaede’s face dropped. “Okay if you’re sure. Come join anytime, or if you need me ‘kay? And If you can’t find me then text me. My phones always off silent.”

Shuichi smiled weakly, “Thank you.”

As Kaede skipped away, he was left alone with his thoughts. He meant to talk to her about why he was wearing his cap, but he just felt unable to fabricate the proper sentence. His mind was so fuzzy with the noise from the music and white noise of chatter around the house that it was hard to think clearly. The lighting was dim, and the room felt stuffy. The smell of drinks and party food felt suffocating. He realised his breathing was faltering.

With his shaky movements he made his way to the kitchen with hopes to get out of the back door, but it seemed to be crowded by a mass of people. In a desperate hurry he made for the nearest door and shut himself inside. He just needed to be alone, fully alone, just for a little while until he could catch his breath. Turning on the light he saw he was in a very elegant looking bathroom. He door, and slid down the wall slowly, resting onto the cool tiled floor, head rested on his knees, trying to regain his breath. God this is what he wanted to avoid, he thought to himself, at least no one saw.

\------

Kokichi saw through hazy eyes as Saihara darted into a side door. He’d ingested a bit of alcohol but he could still see the worried mannerisms of the other boy.  
Without much of a thought Kokichi fumbled over to the door giving it a light knock.

There was no answer.

“You okay in there my beloved Saihara?” Kokichi sang.

“…Yeah,” came a muffled response, “…You can go.”

“You suuure you’re okay? Can I come in saiharaaa?” Kokichi said louder.

He heard the clatter of a lock.

\------

Shuichi opened the door. He really didn’t want to see anyone, but he was scared Oma would attract attention with how loud he was being through the door. As Oma stepped in, shutting the door behind him, Shuichi sank back the floor.

“I wasn’t expecting you to let me in, well even if you didn’t, I would’ve picked the lock.” Oma said, swaying. “That was lie, I knew you’d let me in. You just cant resist me can you, nishishi.”

Shuichi couldn’t exactly tell if Oma was tipsy, or just being Oma. The boy seemed quite composed and like himself, apart from that his balance seemed a little off.

“Wassup anywaays?” Oma continued crouching down. Now he was closer, Shuichi could smell the alcohol around his breath. 

“Nothing I just uh, needed some space.” Shuichi fiddled with the brim of his cap.

“Thought you came in here to cry or whatevs,” 

“No! I don’t-“

“Don’t lie to me, Saiharaa. I can stop a liar. Everyone cries, I can do it right now.” Oma slurred out a laugh. “Just kidding, I’m sure it’ll upset you to see your favourite person upset.”

Shuichi didn’t respond, he wasn’t sure whether this conversation was distracting him or making him or draining him more.

“Yo, ya wanna go get some air? I’ll yell at everyone to leave us alone, I have a pretty authoritative voice.” Oma said.

Shuichi thought, he didn’t want to go back out there but getting fresh air sounded much better than being cooped up in a bathroom. 

“Yeah, okay.” He said, deciding to take the offer. 

Oma smiled and pushed up the brim of Shuichi’s hat with a finger, “Hey pick your head up, king. Your emo hat’s falling down.” 

“Actually, I don’t know why I thought I needed it,” Shuichi said, lifting it off and stuffing it back into his jacket pocket.

Oma stood, regaining his balance he offered Shuichi a hand. The boy on the floor stared at it. Oma’s hand. Small, with chipped purple nail polish, and littered in small bandages. Shuichi took it and was clumsily hoisted up. Oma’s hands were surprisingly soft.


	4. the part(2)y

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> party shenanigans and gay emotions

Shuichi and Oma sat on the back porch staring into Tojo’s monumental garden. Oma had cleared the backdoor of people. The door turned out to be locked but this seemed to just be an opportunity for the shorter boy to show off his lock picking skills. Shuichi didn’t protest, just longing for open fresh air. The two sat in silence, Oma idly swinging his feet back and forth, and Shuichi labelling all the things he could see, hear and smell under his breath. He eyed the bottle Oma had bought out with them. It seemed to be mixed with some purple liquid. For a moment he wondered what it would taste like, but he quickly banished the thought.

“You want some?” Oma asked, “I see ya eyeing it up.”

If he was honest with himself, he did want to try it. He evened out the pros and cons on a metaphorical scale. Eventually curiosity got the better of him.

“Can I…have a sip?” He asked tentatively.

“No keep your grubby hands off!” Oma snapped, “Just kidding! I don’t see why not.”

Shuichi reached out gingerly and took a sip, instantly regretting it as he choked on the unsuspected flavour.

“ugh, what is this mixed with?” He asked almost in disgust.

Oma laughed blaringly, “That’s what you don’t like? Oh man, its grape Panta. I think it tastes great.”

“It does not,” Shuichi replied, smacking his lips to try rid of the lingering flavour. He looked towards Oma. “Why are you staring?”

“Oh, I’m just amused by your disgust, nishishi.”

\------

A few sips turned into a few gulps and soon Shuichi and Oma where sat dizzily on Tojo’s back porch, soaked up in the moment.

“I can’t believe Tojo has a pool!” Oma exclaimed staring out onto the garden. He turned his attention towards Shuichi. “Hey, hey, what classes are you taking?”

“Uhh, criminology…” Shuichi started.

“Ooooh, how come?” Oma interrupted. 

“Um, my uncle works as a detective. I was his apprentice for a while and well, I really enjoyed it. For the most part” He added.

“No way? So, you’re a detective hmmm?” Oma said, leaning closer, grinning. 

As he did Shuichi noticed the braces glinting in Oma’s teeth. How come he never noticed that. Well, its not like he stared at Oma’s mouth much.

“Apprentice!” Shuichi corrected.

Oma lay backwards onto the porch, hands cushioning his head, staring up at the sky. Shuichi followed his actions.

“What if…I was a master thief..aannd you were hunting me down, _buut_ you had no idea it was me! Oma Kokichi, your dearest school mate.” Oma said playfully.

Shuichi laughed. He felt at ease. “I’d arrest your ass.”

“What! How could you do something so heartless,” Oma sniffled, tears brimming his eyes. 

Shuichi chuckled in response; he knew Oma’s crocodile tears trick by now. He was pretty sure everyone who talked the boy at least twice knew it.

“You’re so mean!” Oma wailed.

“what do classes do _you_ take,” Shuichi changed the subject.

Oma, bouncing back to his usual state, scoffed “Pssh, that’s like the least interesting thing about me.”

“then what’s the most interesting?”

Oma leaned on his elbow and turned to the other. He pulled an evil looking face, “hmm, well I _am_ a leader of a secret evil organisation, nishishi.”

Now it was Shuichi’s turn to burst out laughing, “Ahhh, sure you are,” he sighed, staring at the night sky. The air felt cool on his skin. This felt meaningful. Somehow.

After a moment of silence Shuichi heard the noise of rain coating the grass. Sprinklers? Before he could react the two of them were sprayed heavily by the rotation of one, drenching them moderately. Yep, sprinklers.

“Oh, what the shit.” Oma said, sitting up annoyed.

“Did you bring any spear clothes?” Shuichi asked wiping the heavy droplets from his face.

“Nope. But since we’re already soaked ya wnna go jump in the pool?”

\------

Shuichi stood at the side of the pool, swaying slightly. With lazy eyes he investigated the clear lit water. Calm ripples glided from the gentle push of the breeze making small shadows dance on the pools tiled floor. It was its own peaceful world.

“I-I’m not sure,” he said, “we don’t have a change of-“

But before he could finish the small purple fiend gave Shuichi a hearty push. In a panicked instinct Shuichi grabbed onto Oma’s checkerboard shirt, pulling them both down into the pool yelling. The peaceful atmosphere of the pool destroyed as water crashed into Shuichi’s face, ripping the air out of his lungs. When his feet felt the tiles, he pushed up with his legs breaking the surface coughing and spluttering. He stood up in the pool regaining his breath, scraping the wet hair from his eyes. His lungs burnt from the impact and his eyes were still cloudy. Despite himself, he laughed at the aftermath of the exhilarating rush.

As fun as that was, he turned to scold Oma for pushing him, only finding that due to the other his short hight the other could only just get his head out of the water. Oma too, was coughing and he seemed to be struggling to keep his head above water while he wiped his eyes.

“Oh lemme, help.” Shuichi said, still hazy. 

He gripped Oma softly by the sides and carefully pulled the shorter boy up. Oma instinctively rested his hands onto Shuichi’s shoulders for support, and for the first time the two boys made direct eye contact. 

Their eyes met. 

Fear shot through Shuichi like a lighting strike and a burning fire set out over the forest of his insides. Despite the heat he felt he was frozen. His golden Grey eyes locked onto Oma’s Mulberry purple ones. There was no escape now, he was drowning in Oma’s deep wine-coloured gaze. Stuck, Shuichi took in Oma’s whole face. How the light from the pool illuminated his soft masculine features to the tips of his hair. A storm brewed inside Shuichi’s stomach and the longer he stared the larger it grew, but the boy was still unable to tear himself away. He knew this feeling. He felt this once when he looked at Kaede, and that scared him more than the eye contact he was trapped in.

That one minute felt like hours in Shuichi’s head. Only then did he notice how close they were and how terrifyingly intimate it felt. Both soaked and breathing hard in unison, pressed almost completely together. Shuichi felt something uneasy squirm underneath his skin.

“Uhhh, Earth to Saiharaaa.” 

Shuichi was snapped out of his trance to Oma waving a hand in front of his face. He was still holding onto the smaller boy. He blinked slowly and smothered his thoughts before they could be released on a tangent.

“We should probably get dry.” Oma suggested, casually. 

“agreed.” Was all Shuichi could muster before letting go of the other boy.

\------

The two stumbled dripping wet through the backdoor, only to have an aggravated Tojo stride up to them with haste.

“you two! You’re getting water all over the floor, which is a great tripping hazard. That back door was meant to be locked for another hour how did you get out, ugh, follow me, I’ll take you to a dryer.” She complained, briskly ushering them along.

\------

That is how Shuichi then ended up standing awkwardly alone with Oma in Tojo’s basement where the dryer was placed.

“Ok, well, time to strip.” Oma said, unfazed.

“uh you sure this is ok?” Shuichi asked anxiously.

“Tojo gave us towels.”

“uh, yeah,” Shuichi said still feeling incredibly tense about the situation. Despite his embarrassment, he didn’t want to stay in his wet clothes sticking to his skin uncomfortably any longer. Shuichi took off his jacket.

Oma’s eyes widened. “Uhh, Saihara...”

“What?” Shuichi asked looking down to where Oma had glanced. Oh. The water stuck to Shuichi’s sodden white shirt turning it transparent. He felt a new fresh wave of embracement pool over him.

“Nishi, don’t be embarrassed, we’re getting undressed anyway.” Oma turned away, “but don’t worry, I’ll give Mr detective some precious privacy.”

As Shuichi undressed, he felt heat swirl to his face. Having water splashed in his face had helped him sober up immensely and now his familiar worry began flooding back. “this isn’t weird right?” He asked out loud.

“Two guys getting naked in a basement? Nope, not weird at all. Defiantly doesn’t sound like the beginning to a low budget porno.” Oma said sarcastically.

Shuichi huffed in response. The two sat on the countertop, towels wrapped around their waists while they waited for their clothes to dry. Their hair now heavily askew and smelling strongly of chlorine.

\------

Shuichi collapsed onto the sofa. His clothes were warm and fresh from the dryer and despite not having fully recovered from his earlier embarrassment he felt surprisingly comfortable. He glanced over towards the dancefloor where Oma was currently, as Iruma described it, ‘going apeshit’. Apparently, the other boy hadn’t sobered up yet, which could be due to his small size.

Shuichi decided to take advantage of this feeling of calm and rest his eyes, the noise of the music pulsing in his ears like a heavy heartbeat. 

An unknown amount of time later, Oma flopped over the back of the sofa landing next to Shuichi, disturbing him from his light rest. 

“Heyyy mr detective. I brought us drinks. And look they’re in those red cups that you see in movies and fanfictions!” the smaller boy said excitedly.

Not long after came over a very dishevelled looking Iruma.

“Hey shy-hara, you mind if I go hit on your ex?” she said in a vulgar tone.

“huh?” Shuichi was taken aback. Every time someone mentioned Kaede in that context he got an ugly bubbling nauseous feeling in the pits of his gut. 

“Shew, vermin bitch! Back to the sewers where you belong!” Oma scorned dramatically, wafting his hand at her.

“Well fuck you too, brace face. Bet you two would love to see us girls get it on!” Iruma huffed before she scurried away.

“Thank you,” Shucihi sighed.

Oma seemed to ignore his gratitude and stood up turning to him. “Right I’ve had my break, ya wanna come dance, Saiharaaa?”

“Uh, no. defintaly not.”

“BOO!” Oma yelled sticking him a thumbs down.

\------

Into the night Shuichi had lost more and more of his inhibitions. His vision became a blurry haze. Everything was happening so fast, but he was viewing it in slow motion. He saw Oma grabbing his arm and pulling him into the dance floor. He saw Oma laughing. He heard himself laugh too. He saw Kaede laugh. Maybe she looked concerned too. Shuichi was having a hard time analysing the details he so often did. suddenly he saw the floor approach him, but he hardly felt it hit him. Then he saw a toilet bowl, his hands latched around the edge. He heard a voice.

“K-Kaede?” He asked.

He turned to see her face but was met with Oma’s. Shuichi couldn’t tell what expression the boy had, only that Oma was rested on his knees next to him. Oma shoved a glass of water to his mouth. He could hear the other boy’s voice, but it sounded like white noise. As he drank more water his head slowly cleared

\------

When he came out of his haze, he found himself on the sofa, the house looking almost empty. What time was it? Have most people left? Feeling nauseous, he looked around the room for people he knew. Kaede and Harukawa were chatting across from him. Oma was snoring on a corner chair.

“Oh, Shuichi, you’re awake.” Keade said as she noticed him get up. “You alright? Ready to get back to the dorms?”

“Wh-what about Oma?” Shuichi asked, looking over to the sleeping boy.

“What about him?” Harukawa questioned coldly.

“We can’t just leave him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they were not five feet apart F  
> anyways thanks for reading!


	5. The night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi and Shuichi have a weird heart to heart while Kokichi internally screams

Stood at the bus stop with his two friends and a groggy Oma, who’s arm was hoisted over his shoulder, Shuichi prayed for the bus to come soon. Mamota had gone home early, so he was only accompanied by Kaede and Harukawa also. They chattered contently looking how they did when they first arrived. Both of them hadn't gotten drunk. Shuichi was sure he looked like a mess. Chlorine covered tousled hair, having thrown up, carrying a half-asleep Oma. Why were all his friends responsible except him. The night air bristled against his skin sharply and even Oma’s small weight made his exhausted body tremble. He felt gross and ashamed stood next to the two girls. The thought of collapsing to fall asleep shivering on the freezing concrete seemed comfortable to him in this situation.

Bus lights finally shone from the distance, picking up Shuichi’s spirits, and soon the teens had settled on the vehicles back seats. Oma had begun drifting off again and flopped onto Shuichi’s lap. He gave a small grunt of discomfort but decided to leave the sleeping boy, too tired himself to protest. The bus ride was mostly silent. Kaede tried to make small talk while Harukawa stared daggers into a peaceful looking Oma. Shuichi was too exhausted to respond to anything properly.

\------

After bidding adieu to the girls, he dragged Oma back to his dorm. He let Oma take out his keys fumbling with the lock and helped the boy inside. 

Turning the light on Shuichi couldn’t help but look around Oma’s eccentric room. The back wall was lined with a grid of hooks, a variety of masks hanging from each one. The boy’s desk was barely visible with the amount of papers and clutter littering it, more notes pinned to the wall disorderly, each covered in a detail writing and illustrations. A large whiteboard stood beside it, blank.

Oma batted Shuichi away from him like an aggravated cat. “I’m fine, I can walk by myself.” He grumbled, swaying over and falling onto his bed like a plank.

Shuichi hesitated. It was obvious Oma still wasn’t sober, as much as it looked like the boy was trying to hide it, Shuichi had the ability to pick up on small traits. Was it acceptable to leave him like this? He didn’t want Oma to be mad at him for leaving, although this was Oma he was thinking about and the liar would probably be more aggravated to hear that he’d been taken care of. Despite himself, Shuichi made a decision. 

“Alright,” he started, “I’m going to get you some water from the common room, wait there.”

Oma groaned a muffled response, still lying face down into the sheets. He held a weak thumbs up.

\------

Shuichi returned with a glass of water and having changed into his sleep clothes. He wasn’t planning on sleeping in Oma’s room, he just needed to wear something more comfortable. Oma however hadn’t moved since he left. He gave the smaller boy a gentle shake. Oma groaned, irritated, but kept his head down. Shuichi gritted his teeth. He guessed that he’d just woken the other up.

“I- I’ll just leave this here.” Shuichi stuttered, resting the glass on a small clear space of the bedside table, the rest of the surface being cluttered with various knickknacks and trinkets. 

It seemed Oma was quite the hoarder. An accumulation of unique items and bric-a-brac populated his shelves densely, cans and bottles of fizzy drinks unorderly stood across his windowsill, and Shuichi could safely guess Oma’s desk draws were probably full to the brim.

“Saiharaa?” Oma said weakly, finally tilted his head to look at the other boy.

Shuichi froze, “Um, yes?”

“Let’s have a sleepover,” Oma said with a sleepy grin.

“…No.”

“Whyyy,” Oma snivelled, tears brimmed in his eyes. 

“Don’t try that. It won’t work.” Shuichi said sternly.

Oma responded by glaring at him with puppy eyes. Goddammit it worked. Shuichi mentally cursed at himself. Part of him was too tired to walk back to his dorm anyway, he reasoned with himself.

“Fine.” He huffed, planning to leave as soon as Oma sobered up.

\------

With the sea of cool moonlight sailing through Oma’s blinds, the details of the room faded into the shadows and the atmosphere was calmly silent. The only noise being the breathing of the two boys, the police show which played on Oma’s laptop, and the hum of white noise from the world itself.

Shuichi lay on Oma’s floor, with one pillow beneath him and his stolen throw blanket above him. It wasn’t exactly a comfortable but with his level of exhaustion, Shuichi wasn’t picky. Despite his body yearning for sleep his mind wouldn’t rest. His thoughts mostly consisted of the party. Of his hazy memories. Of the boy sleeping on the bed next and above him.

“Hey, are you feeling better?” Shuichi asked, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t see Oma from his position on the floor, wondering if the other was even awake. It’d been silence between them since they both got under separate covers.

\------

“Hmm, yeah.” Kokichi responded. That was half a lie. He was sober but he felt awful. Late at night was the time that people asked ‘serious’ questions, right? His question wasn’t really serious to him but to Saihara…

“So…what’s the deal with you and Kaede?” He wondered aloud.

“Um, nothing.” Saihara replied. He sounded taken aback.

Kokichi leaned over the side of the bed, peaking down at Saihara with just his eyes showing. The other boy tuned his head to him.

“Look, something _obviously_ happened between you two.” He said, raising an eyebrow. Kokichi was aware it was probably a sensitive subject, but he’d never been afraid to speak what he’s thinking, even if that was in the form of a lie.

“We, just…” Saihara began. “We dated last year for a bit that’s all. I don’t know why it’s still brought up.”

“hm, I wasn’t expecting you to actually tell me,” Kokichi said. That was the truth. He tried to lighten the mood. “Were you too emo for her or something? Couldn’t get it up in bed?” 

“What? N- no! she just said she liked me as a friend, nothing crazy happened. I understood of course, but it still hurt. I’m glad she told me though. She said she didn’t want to lie about her feelings.” Shuichi vented.

Lie about your feelings huh? Kokichi thought to himself, flopping back onto his bed to watch the ceiling. He couldn’t remember a time when he hadn’t lied about his feelings. Well there were two times he was honest about those kinds of feelings. The first pushed away his friends and the second pushed away his parents. Why would he ever tell anyone that though.

“I can’t relate. I always lie. But if I could hypnotise Kaede to love you back I would” he jested.

“Heh, thanks…but I don’t feel that way about her anymore.” Saihara paused. “Hey, are you doing anything in the holidays?”

It was clear Saihara wanted to change the subject. Kokichi wasn’t fond of the new topic, however. He _was_ doing something in the holidays, but that was his business only.

“I’ve got some evil leader business to tend to. My organisation needs me, ya know.” He said. A lot of lies are just exaggerated truths, he thought to himself. With that power people could know a lot about him, but also know nothing about him at the same time. Having that power was like having a protective shield to Kokichi.

“Ohh, your infamous organisation. So that wasn’t a one-time joke?” Saihara questioned, his voice seasoned with amusement.

“Whatever made you think it was a joke? Anyways what are _you_ doing these holidays, Mr. detective.” Kokichi asked, aiming to direct the attention away from himself.

“I’m just gonna go see my uncle and his wife. Nothing special” Shuichi whispered in return.

“Why, your parents dead or something?” Kokichi blurted out. He mentally smacked himself for saying that. What if his parents were dead and Saihara started crying? If only he had an off switch to his voice, Kokichi longed with regret.

“Uhh, no. they’re just away with work…a lot.” Saihara answered. He seemed unfazed. 

Kokichi let out a silent breath of relief. “You got a case of the shitty parents, too?” he asked. 

Shit he added ‘too’. He felt as if he was letting down his act in his tired state. Kokichi screamed at himself in his head. Saihara would defiantly pick up on his words, the boy overanalysed everything.

“No, they’re not shitty. They just have a hands-off way of parenting, I guess.” Shuichi chuckled awkwardly. “Uh, why, are your parents- “

“Naah, that was a lie. I didn’t wanna make you feel bad if you did have shitty parents.” Kokichi answered confidently. Saved it.

“Don’t worry I’m not going to be jealous...” Saihara said with another pause. “Hey Oma? I’ve been telling you things about myself but, you haven’t really answered much, honestly at least.”

“Huh, whatcha mean?” Kokichi played dumb. The atmosphere seemed stagnant and awkward to him. Why was Saihara prodding him to talk about himself. Did the detective seriously want to know more about him. A part of him hoped the other boy didn’t plan to be friends. 

“I don’t really know anything about you.” Saihara said. But it sounded like he asked the room more than Kokichi himself.

Kokichi didn’t take his eyes away from the ceiling. He could hear that he breathed almost in tandem with the other boy. This moment felt special, somehow. But his feelings won’t be the ones to determine any of his actions. He let out an exaggerated sigh.

“Fine, you wanna know shit. Well is Oma Kokichi trivia tiiime,” He began. “I _hate_ grape Panta. I _despise_ lies and games. Halloween is the _worst_ holiday. And Shonen anime is a _terrible_ genre.” 

Those were all easily readable lies. It was plain sarcasm at best. Kokichi knew that Saihara could’ve guessed he liked these things, which is the reason he didn’t care about telling the other. It was deeper and more personal things that Kokichi would smother with a thick icing of lies to mask the flavour of the truth behind them.

“I like Halloween too,” Saihara whispered. “Are you excited that it’s almost here?”

Kokichi grinned, although the other couldn’t see.

\------

Soon after more playful chitchat the two faded into silence once again and Shuichi shifted, stretching on the floor. He could go back to his own dorm room now, but sleep was almost upon him. Oma had been quiet for a while, which was unlike him. Shuichi looked up towards the bed but from this angle he couldn’t see anything.

“Are we friends?” Shuichi asked in a careful whisper to the room.

The only reply was a soft snoring.

Shuichi hummed and closed his eyes. He was soon greeted by the peaceful embrace of sleep. Gunshots echoed from Oma’s laptop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no one:  
> Shuichi: I, uh, ah, um..
> 
> It is time to give Kokichis inner thoughts more love. I hope this chapter wasn't boring


	6. The morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi has gay panic and Shuichi has realisations

Shuichi awoke to sunlight blaring in his eyes angrily. He blinked, disorientated, trying to gain recognition of his surroundings. Soon his memory kicked in and he saw he was in Oma’s room. Shuichi wasn’t used to the thin broken blinds letting all the sunlight pour in. He was much more accustomed to his blackout blinds in his own room, which made it look as if it were constantly night.

He stretched with a grunt, yawning silently. He felt stiff from a night on the floor. He also felt incredibly drowsy and slightly nauseated. With a deep regret of drinking, he sat up and looked over to the bed. Oma was curled up in the blankets facing away from him. The boy seemed to be sleeping rather peacefully. Shuichi’s heart clenched uncomfortably, but he quickly tried to shake away the feeling. The holidays began today, and he needed to get packed for a week back with his uncle.

Deciding not to wake Oma, Shuichi carefully tiptoed to the door. He looked back to his thieved blanket on the floor, choosing to leave it. There was always another time he could fetch it. Before he left, he quickly sent a text to the sleeping boy, as a note for when he awoke.

**me:** sorry for leaving while u was still asleep I didn’t want to wake u up

**me:** enjoy the holidays :)

Should he have sent the emojicon? He was overthinking it. Well it was too late now.

\------

Kokichi had awoken when he heard Shuichi stir, but he had felt too exhausted and hungover to get up or even open his eyes fully. God, he felt like the personification of death. His skin was coated in grease and his head felt like it was being beat violently from all sides. Next to that he was also mentally kicking himself for asking Saihara to stay the night. This was not originally part of his plan. 

Initially he wanted to get closer to the boy so he would help Kokichi sneak into the party, so why did Kokichi feel the need to spend time with Saihara afterwards? He was getting too close to the other boy, letting his emotions get the better of him. What if Saihara started considering him friend? The thought made his head pound, or maybe that was the hangover. He wished he drank more water and sobered up completely before falling asleep. Well regrets solve nothing, the party was worth crashing, he thought.

Unsteadily, the short boy slipped out of bed and moped to the shower. He glanced in the mirror before stpping in. His bedhead was all over the place, his face had seen better days too.

“Hey handsome.” He joked to the mirror groggily, shooting finger-guns.

Refreshing cold water sprayed down his back. As he washed, his head cleared and more memories from the night before surfaced. He remembered Saihara collapsing, which was hilarious at first but turned concerning when the other boy didn’t get back up. He remembered having helped Saihara up the stairs and letting the boy grossly upchuck into the toilet while he got water. Normally Kokichi wouldn’t have put down his ruthless act to care for someone but Kokichi was almost positive the other wouldn’t remember. Plus, he didn’t want Saihara to throw up all over the floor because he’d certainly be the one get blamed for it, having supplied the alcohol, and be kicked out. He reasoned this to himself in his head. 

Thoughts wandered to earlier in the night. The two had jumped in the pool, he recalled. On one hand it was the most fun thing he had done in a while but on the other hand the memory of Saihara’s wide stormy golden eyes on his made Kokichi’s head swim drunkenly. He had never managed to get a good look at the other boys’ eyes before, as they were usually angled towards the ground. Kokichi found the boys awkwardness to be almost endearing, cute even. Saihara’s whole personality and appearance seemed to radiate that to him.

He sighed in his feelings. Kokichi knew he liked boys. There was a difference between lying to yourself and being ignorant of yourself. Sure, he acted like he genuinely believed in his lies, as that’s what makes a good lie, but there’s always a subconscious awareness underneath. Kokichi had to be aware of himself. It’s how he felt in control. He was just particularly pissed off about liking _this_ boy. Wrong time and wrong place. Kokichi had planned to keep his lie to himself up a little longer. His whole life if he had to. But it was getting trickier and trickier when his emotions betrayed him like this.

Kokichi also knew that people didn’t particularly like him here. With his eccentric personality and mischievous tendencies, he understood why he didn’t quite appeal to others so much. He was an acquired taste. Momota and Haraukawa acted as if they despised him, despite Kokichi acting as if they were old time friends. Technically Harukawa was an old time ‘friend’, having known each other since they were little kids. Iruma and Keebo seemed to tolerate his antics at best. Shuichi however, acted as if he genuinely _liked_ Kokichi, or at least wanted to spend time with him. Kokichi would lie and tell himself he hated it. 

Kokichi was a liar. The truth never worked for him. Lying was much more controllable. His lies were only truths that he adopted. It made his life easier. Even if his emotions told him otherwise, Kokichi would lie. He was an expert liar. In fact, he prided himself on it. So, if he had to convince himself he liked girls, then so be it. If he had to convince himself to push away Saihara, then so be it.

With an irritated face of frustration, Kokichi furiously scrubbed shampoo through his purple locks. The bittersweet image of Saihara’s stupid irises framed by his stupid pretty eyelashes played over in his head like a broken tape. 

\------

Lay on his stomach atop his bed, A towel wrapped around his waste and one hugged around his head, Kokichi opened his phone to a plethora of notifications. Most coming from the group chat he made for the party.

**Iruma:** OMA YOU LIEING FUCK YOU STOLE ALL THE ALCOHOL FOR YOURSELF

**Keebo:** where are you guys???

**Iruma:** WHOS DICK I GOTTA SUCK TO GET A HIGH AROUND HERE?

**Keebo:** GUYS??

Kokichi snorted at the two idiots’ messages. The group chat hadn’t been active since last night. He decided to reignite the fire.

**Me:** I CANT BELIEVE YOU LEFT ME YOU ASSHOLES

Surprisingly he saw the typing symbol for both of them come up right after.

**Keebo:** that is a LIE you two ditched ME!

**me:** where the hell were you???

**Iruma** : I saw shrimp and that emo twink come from the back door all soaking wet 

**Iruma:** bet there was some freaky pool action goin on

**Keebo:** IRUMA

Kokichi closed the chat immediately after reading that. He was not ready to deal with that in his current hungover state. If the two ask him about it, he’ll just lie and swerve the question away. He saw two other notifications from only Saihara. Don’t open them, he thought. He opened them.

**Saiharara:** sorry for leaving while u was still asleep I didn’t want to wake u up

**Saiharara:** enjoy the holidays :) 

**me:** no problemo u too detective 

That’s it. Don’t write any more, he told himself. Saihara didn’t need to be a constant in his life. The boy made him feel uneasy, and Kokichi doesn’t get uneasy. Sure, Saihara was fun to mess with. He played along with Kokichis games and would challenge him. He wasn’t someone he was stuck with, like Iruma and Keebo. He and Saihara actively spent time together, not out of obligation. The detective seemed to meet the mischief maker on the same mental level, with genuine interest, and that’s what concerned Kokichi. Saihara wasn’t boring.

\------

It was the late evening and students were dispersing slowly from the campus for the October holidays. Kokichi stood at the gates, holding onto the straps of large rucksack on his back. He pulled his checkerboard scarf higher to cover his face from the autumn chill. A giddy excitement vibrated in his bones. The October holidays were his favourite. Not only did he get to see the people he cared most about, he got to spend Halloween with them. And what happens when a group of uncaged and eccentric teens spend Halloween together? Chaos and fun happened. Kokichi couldn’t be more excited.

“HEY midget!” he heard Iruma’s vulgar voice call from behind him. “Ya gonna run off without saying goodbye?”

He turned, sticking both of his middle fingers up, seeing both Iruma and Keebo. They gathered in a small triangle.

“ _Why_ would I bother saying goodbye to worthless cum dump like you?” despite his words, he was smiling.

“Oh, shut it, metal mouth.” Iruma snapped back, hands on hips.

“Guys! Can’t we just have a nice farewell.” Keebo huffed, covering the front of his face with his jacket collar to brace the cold. 

“Ugh geeez, fine” Oma groaned. He pulled a meaningful expression. “See ya…sluts.”

Keebo facepalmed aggressively.

“What d’ya want off me? A kiss? Weeell sorry I don’t swing that way, Keeboy.” Kokichi lied. “I’ll miss picking on you guys…anyways so long.”

“Hold on there, bitch boy!” Iruma said before Kokichi could turn to leave. “I’m pretty sure you _do_ swing that way. Theres _noo_ other explanation for you and Shyhara coming in soaking wet at that party!”

“Oh, you mean the pool? The bastard pushed me in, he’s such a meanie!” Kokichi cried, pulling a hurt expression. Despite his playful response, he felt as if walls were closing in on him from Iruma’s remark. 

“Hey there he is.” Keebo pointed.

Kokichi looked over to where the others finger was directed. He saw a familiar blue mop of hair. Saihara was with his usual group of friends, being embraced rather firmly in Momata’s arms, looking more like he was being constricted rather than hugged.

“Hey, Shyhara! Get your virgin ass over here!” Iruma screamed.

Despite looking irritated at her statement, Saihara waved to his friends and trotted over. Kokichi was slightly surprised he obeyed Iruma’s demand. Maybe he really did like doing what he was told, Kokichi wondered jokingly to himself. The three stopped in a group waiting for the other boy to come over.

Iruma pointed to Kokichi “Did you push this shrimp in the pool with your flimsy beta boy strength?”

“Huh?” he said, scratching the back of his neck. “N- no. It was the other way around actually.”

All eyes turned to Kokichi, who grinned mischievously in response.

“Oopsie! I guess I lied.” He shrugged.

“you fuckin’ little-” Iruma yelled in Kokichi’s face as he laughed.

Saihara shot him a calm smile that made Kokichi’s gut twist furiously.

“I seriously gotta head out. Have fun on your scooby doo missions with your weird uncle, mr detective” Kokichi said, poking Saihara’s chest playfully. The other boy didn’t seem to react to it.

“Wait who the fuck?” Iruma raised an eyebrow.

“You didn’t know? Saihara’s a detective.” Kokichi said, wrapping around Saiaharas arm. He was feeling brave.

“assistant!” corrected Saihara, who seemed flustered.

Saihara slipped his arm out from his grasp and placed it on Kokichi’s shoulder gingerly. Now it was his turn to get flustered, although on the outside the liar was still completely composed.

“No fuckin way!” Iruma exclaimed, “You examine dead bodies for a living? I bet ya get off to it ya creep!”

“What? Ugh no! and there’s more to detective work than that!” Saihara argued, removing his hand from Kokichis shoulder and stumbling over his words.

“see! Total fucking creep!” 

Kokichi looked up at Shaihara’s shy blushing face. His feelings seemed to scream _OH NO_

\------

The group eventually dispersed, bidding their farewells. Shuichi looked back at Oma, who walked away with his hands behind his head casually. Lately his mind seemed to be focused on the other boy a lot. Oma’s wide variety of expressions, how he always seems to make any situation fun, how his eyes look in the pool light, how his voice sounds when it’s at a whisper…

Shuichi had felt this feeling before. He used to feel this when he was making friends with Kaede, which Is what worried him. He shouldn’t be thinking this way about another boy. he shouldn’t be feeling this way. 

A part of him longed to be walking beside the other boy, which filled him with a heavy sense of guilt. Shuichi spun back to return to his friends, trying to hide the dejected look on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not much happens this chapter, I wanted to dedicate the majority of it to Kokichi's thoughts and feelings. However i'm excited to finish the next chapter because ohh boy.  
> as always thanks for reading!


	7. The holidays

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shuichi and Kokichi reunite with family members and Kokichi opens up to someone close to him  
> WARNING - the f slur is mentioned in this chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! took a short break while the site was under maintenance but I'm back to regular updates now  
> also pls check the summaries as I put any warnings for anything that could be triggering there, thanks!

Shuichi pressed the doorbell, anxiously clutching the straps of his bags until his knuckles turned pale. After a moment of waiting he heard a click and the door swung open revealing Shuichi’s uncle, a worn looking man in his forties. Before the teen could say anything, Shuichi was pulled into a suffocating embrace, the thick sent of musty cologne smothering him. His uncle pulled away, smiling slightly. 

“Sorry, I just…really missed you.” His uncle apologised.

Shuichi smiled back warmly.

\------

Stepping in his old room, Shuichi saw it was exactly how he left it. The room appeared as if it’d been untouched by time itself, the only traces being the faint settling of dust on the surfaces. The bedroom was small and dim, decorated in old vintage furniture. A plenitude of books was stacked at the end of the iron framed bed while more were crowded upon the bookshelf beside them. He felt at home.

“Shuichi?” he heard his uncle call behind him.

He stepped into the kitchen where his uncle was rifling around in a draw.

“I got this in the mail the other day...from your parents.” His uncle said, handing him a letter taken from the draw.

Shuichi glared down at the brown glossed surface of the letter like it had committed a murder. “Thank you.” He said, although he struggled to sound thankful.

After returning to his room, the teen sat down on his bed alone, hands fiddling with already worn corners of the letter. He debated opening it, but it would most likely say all the same things as the others.

_Thinking of you. Hope high school is going okay. We’re having a wonderful time. Sorry we cant make it home this month._

The more he thought about it, the more anger swelled grossly inside of him. When was the last time he saw them in person? When was the last time he’d heard their voice in person? Do short phone calls and quick airport visits even count. A part of him was glad they never came to visit; he wasn’t sure how he’d even react around them after so long. if he saw them for long enough how would they treat him? He'd never felt like their son and imagining them treating him like one felt foreign and almost wrong. An angry guilt surfaced for his thoughts.

“Shuichi! Dinner!” He heard his uncle call, bringing him from his thoughts.

His anger towards his parents soon transformed into a gratefulness towards his uncle. The guardian he had now was a better parent than some writing on a letter, or a voice down a phone.

“Coming!” He replied, placing the unopened letter on his bedside table.

\------

After walking along a nostalgic woodland footpath, Kokichi stood in front of a towering chain link fence. Scattered and tangled barbed wire lined the tops while brambles and weeds crowded the ground around it. trees swarmed the rest of the woodland area. Having been here countless times, Kokichi had memorised exactly where the entrance was. He peeled back a small cut in the fence and using his nimble body, he slipped through. 

Trudging down a brambled slope on the other side, Kokichi came onto a concrete pathway leading to a central circular opening. Old stalls blanketed in moss and rot stood around the sides along with rusted benches and shattered lamps. Ancient looking and broken-down amusement park rides loomed all around, overgrown plant foliage winding its way all over them. This abandoned theme park, claimed once again by nature, was Kokichi’s adopted headquarters. 

As he arrived in the central area, he heard music and the laughter and chattering of familiar voices. Kokichi looked over, seeing a group of teens of varying ages. they wore casual streetwear, except each one donned one random piece of clothing that was printed in a checkerboard pattern. One teen only had checker patterned socks while another wore full checker overalls. The patter was considered the secret ‘uniform’ that all D.I.C.E members always wore. No matter what type of clothing or how visible it was, they were always wearing checkers upon them somewhere.

“Oh, my beloved recruits! Your gracious leader has finally arrived!” Kokichi dramatically announced. He held his arms out wide, bowing slightly.

The teens conversing stopped, and ten pairs of eyes were upon him. In an instant they all screamed his name in unison and bolted towards him. A matter of seconds later, the small boy was being tackled to the ground in a large rough group hug. He’d never felt more at home.

“Alright, alright.” He laughed, pushing the giggling lot off of him. “Now who brought the spray paint?”

\------

After galivanting around the streets for a whole day, the gang parted ways, Kokichi leaving with one other member to stay the night at their house. This was the status quo since he left his parents’ place. He’d live in the high school dorms during term and when the holidays would arrive he’d stay a night at a member of D.I.C.E’s house. Kokichi never once planned to go back to his parents’ house, although a brief thought of it would cross his mind once or twice.

After arriving at his member's and dear friend, Saeko's house, the two sat chattering in her room. He had always been welcomed there like family. The two shuffled out playing cards while Kokichi ranted about recent events.

“-and he had the _audacity_ to lift me up in the pool! And then look me in the eyes with this _look_ and then get all flustered about it? what the hell is this guy’s deal?” Kokichi complained. The members of D.I.C.E were the only ones he never feared being honest around, knowing for certain he could trust them after spending the majority of his life amongst them all.

"Hmm so I guess the alcohol I gave you came in handy?" Saeko grinned.

"Oh yeah I owe you big time for that." He replied.

“So Kokichi. This guy...do you like him~? Saeko smirked, with a tune to her voice.

“Pffft, no! You know I don’t swing that way!” He joked, trying to hide his flustered expression. The room felt suddenly like it was heating up rapidly.

“Hah! I know you do. There’s no denying it. I basically grew up with you!” Saeko laughed back, playing with a faded peach pigmented strand of hair. “You know, its ok to get close to him. Let yourself be happy, Kokichi!”

“Okay! I'll flirt with him like craaazy next time I see him!” He sang entusistically, “But that's a lie. I’m already happy. You guys are all I need.” 

Despite his words he took Saeko’s statement into consideration. Perhaps he shouldn’t just cut Saihara off. Maybe an easier option would be to get more personal with him to see where the other stands. The two main possible outcomes would be that Saihara would reciprocate, or he’d be scared off by Kokichi. It was a win either way to the leader. The sudden buzz from his phone distracted the boy away from his thoughts.

 **woman who birthed me:** so I take it you’re not coming home again

Scoffing, he turned his phone over, so the screen was facing downwards. There was no point in replying as it’d just spark an argument, if past event were anything to go off.

“Everything ok?” Saeko asked softly, seeing Kokichi’s aggravated expression after glancing at his phone.

He folded his arms nonchalantly, looking to the side. “I’m wonderful. It’s just my parents.” 

Saeko pulled a sympathetic face that gave Kokichi an aggravated feeling. “Why not go see them this holiday? Perhaps just for one day?” She prompted.

“What? So they can ask me if I have a girlfriend for the five hundredth time, and when I say no call me a fag? I’m not totally stoked on that. Plus, the travel is too much effort.” He forced himself to sound light-hearted. 

“Kokichi...” Saeko leant on her hand, looking downtrodden, “I’m sorry you got stuck with shitty parents. I’m just glad you’re not stuck back _there_. You always have Dice here, too.”

He may as well have been stuck back _there_ , Kokichi thought. It’s not like he actually had a house which he felt like he belonged to. Just an abandoned amusement park fit for an abandoned kid. No, he wasn’t abandoned, he corrected himself. He looked up at his friend, his family. He had ten people that knew how he felt. Ten people that would never abandon him. That was all he needed.

“I know,” he smiled genuinely at his last thought, “Hey you wanna game of YuGiOh? I’ve added to my deck!”

“Of course, I’m gonna whoop your ass though. By the way how’s Harukawa?” Saeko asked as she began digging around under her bed for her card deck.

“She died. Tragically!” Kokichi sniffed as his voice shaked.

“Kokichi! That’s not funny!” She scoled him lightly, sitting back up.

He laughed, shrugging “Ugghhh, she still hates my guts. But what’s new?” 

"Man, I wish she'd actually speak to us. I kinda wanna thank her for taking care of me when we were kids.” Saeko said, shuffling her cards. “Hey, Kokichi? Are you thinking about telling that guy how you feel?”

Kokichi tried not to splutter at that, being caught off by the sudden question. “You mean tell him I think he’s a huge nerd? I’m pretty sure I’ve already told him that at _least_ a bazillion times.”

“You _know_ what I mean.” 

“It’s not like thaaat!” Kokichi groaned. “And despite my mannerisms, I am _not_ fond of the thought of the whole academy knowing my sexuality, because you know how that shit spreads.”

“Are you sure its not like that? Because you seem to mention him every time we text.” Saeko said, quirking a brow.

“I don’t even know if he likes guys!” Kokichi protested. That was true. Sure Saihara fit into some stereotypes but that proved nothing. There was no way to determine without asking him directly or if Kokichi stumbled upon the other making out with a guy or something. That last thought made his stomach twist angrily so he quickly banished it from his mind.

“Hm, Why don’t you try and find out?” Saeko suggested, shrugging.

“Uhhh, how exactly? I can’t just walk up to the guy and say ‘yo Saihara you like dick? Oh-my-god me toooo!’ that’s not how it works!” Kokichi complained.

“How are you our leader when you can’t even control your love life…” His friend sighed.

“I _am_ in control of my love life and yes I _am_ your leader so you better watch how to talk to me!” Kokichi pointed sternly. 

After a moment of staring each other down with faces of stone, the two burst out in laughter. Kokichi’s phone buzzed again. He checked the screen with an annoyed expression coating his face, expecting it to be one of his parents.

 **Saiharara:** Hey Keade’s having a get together this halloween and she says you’re welcome to come

 **Saiharara:** I remember you saying you were excited for halloween so Its ok if you have plans

“Speak of the devil…Saihara just asked me if I wanted to go to a Halloween party.” He said looking back up to his friend.

Saeko clapped her hands excitedly “Ohhh. This is the perfect opportunity. Say yes!”

“No way! What kind of leader would I be if I didn’t spend the best holiday with my favourite people!” Kokichi furrowed his brow. Halloween was his favourite time to spend with D.I.C.E and no stupid pretty boys were going to get in the way of that. 

"Why don't you spend it with us and just show up fashionably late.” She suggested.

“Why would I even want to go.” Kokichi rolled his eyes. “His friends don’t partially like me.” That was true. They seemed to show nothing but distaste for his antics. If only Saihara would hang around with him instead, he thought jealously.

“Maybe to spend some quality time which a certain someone?” She asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

“You’re gonna make me aren’t you?” he said. Despite the look of distaste on his face he was feeling quite giddy from the thought of seeing Saihara again so soon, although he refused to directly acknowledge that.

“I am indeed! But, do not worry my dear leader, for we will hatch a plan.” She said almost deviously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I included a member of D.I.C.E in this chapter bc at this point in time I don't think kokichi would be willing to open up to anyone other than them. however I don't think they'll be present much in future chapters.  
> But yeah, here D.I.C.E is just a gang of teens that have know each other all their lives  
> also next chapter will be split in 2 parts  
> as always, I hope you enjoyed


	8. The twister game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keade has a Halloween get together, Iruma is being Iruma, and Shuichi regrets a game of twister

Fog roamed the sky, illuminated eerily by the rays of the full moon. It was the perfect atmosphere for Halloween, only a little too chilly. One of Kokichi’s favourite things about this holiday is that he could dress however he wanted and not be questioned for it. It was also one of the times D.I.C.E could parade out in the open without a fear of being recognised. They had to keep their ‘organisation’ a secret after all. 

Kokichi and his gang of beloved members roamed around the streets, all clad in the costumes they wore every Halloween. Matching white clothing looking awfully like straightjackets accompanied with checkerboard bandanas tied around their necks. Each member however wore a different clown or harlequin themed mask. As the leader Kokichi also donned an authoritative looking hat and cape which swam dramatically in the breeze.

Into the night Saeko tugged on his sleeve. “Kokichi, isn’t it time you got ready for the party?” She prompted.

The leader looked to his members, currently spray panting an empty brick wall, a couple of them keeping lookout. “Uggh but I was having fuuun.” He complained, pouting childishly.

“Trust me, it’ll be worth it!” She said through her mask. “Plus, it’s getting late anyways. Let’s go and get you ready!”

\------

Shuichi sat, looking deflated on Kaede’s sofa, watching people converse in the aesthetically dimly lit living room. Music was playing at softer volume, unlike at Tojo’s party, and there was a significantly less amount of people. Keade had described it as a get together more than a party. It felt more personal. Everyone here Shuichi had spoken to at least once before, making him feel safer in the atmosphere. Despite that, Oma hadn’t arrived yet and Shuichi was beginning to think that he wouldn’t. A part of him wanted to see the other boy at least once in the holidays, but he guessed that Oma really did have more important things to do this Halloween. 

Feeling the Sofa dip next to him, Shuichi looked over, seeing Amami Rantaro sit down beside him. Amami put out a casual arm around the back of the sofa.

“Hey, you sad that Oma isn’t here?” he asked in a deep relaxed voice, looking over to the other.

Shuichi stared back, puzzled. How did Amami of all people know that. “How…did you know?”

Amami chuckled, “I’ve seen you two hanging out more, ever since Tojo’s party. But don’t worry. Oma texted me that he’s coming tonight.”

Shuichi perked up at that. Oma texted Amami? “I didn’t know you two were close.” He wondered aloud.

“Oh, we’re not really.” Amami said, holding up his hands almost defensively. “He’s kind of like an annoying younger brother to me.”

Shuichi smiled at that. Just then there was an obnoxious knock on the door and both boys swivelled their heads towards the source of the noise. Before Keade could even open it, the door burst open with Oma strutting in.

“Ohhh Akumatsu!” He greeted loudly, holding his hands out. Instead of hugging her, he shrugged off the dense fluffy coat he was wearing and draped it over one of her extended arms, giving the girl a sweet innocent smile.

“Who invited this failed abortion?” Iruma called out from across the room, Keebo protesting quietly beside her.

“And who invited this slut?” Oma shot back with venom in his tone.

“I invited them because I though you guys got along what the hell!” Keade said, baffled.

Shuichi couldn’t help but eye up Oma’s brightly coloured outfit, which somehow looked stylish despite its eccentricity. It contrasted greatly with the dark tones he wore.

“Speak of the devil.” Amami muttered, ruffling a hand through his green locks.

After being scolded by Kaede for being a ‘rude guest’ and finishing his back and forth with Iruma, Oma marched over to the two boys. “Hey, my beloved Amami and Saihara!” He said, sitting himself squashed between them, propping his chequered trainers onto the coffee table carelessly. Oma leaned back comfortably and casually as if he wasn’t half sat on both of the other boys. Shuichi stiffened from the sudden close contact.

“Do you have to be like that?” Amami said to Oma, unimpressed.

“Like what, hmm?” The small boy replied, stretching his arms to take up even more space.

Rantaro pushed him off with a chuckle making Oma fall fully across Shuichi’s lap. He looked up at the nervous detective’s face and grinned with his tongue trapped between his teeth.

“This is much more comfortable!” Oma said smiling and Shuichi couldn’t help but smile back and roll his eyes at the other boy’s antics.

\------

Much later into the night, almost everyone had gone home. Only he, Oma, Amami, Keebo and Iruma had agreed to sleep over and all camp in the living room. Mamota and Harukawa had gone to get snacks but would be returning. 

Shuichi watched as Oma snuck over to Keade across the room and whisper something to her. The girls face seemed to light up and she stepped into the centre of the room, Oma smiling deviously in the background.

“Everyone! We’re gonna have a game of twister! So, if you want to join please come up, but to make it more interesting we’re going to play it in black light!” She said excitedly flicking on the blacklight bar attached to the wall. The room was cast in a calm purple hue making any neon colours spring out. “Also a big thanks to Oma for supplying the game.”

So that was the boys plan. Oma strode over to Shuichi excitedly. He already knew what the other was going to ask.

“No.” Shuichi protested weakly.

The other boys smile did not fade but in fact turned into an evil and ominous grin.

“NO!” 

\------

Shuichi struggled to hold his body weight on the twister board wondering how he’d been coerced into this. The mat was illuminated in purple from the blacklight and all the coloured circles shone out brightly. He had to admit it looked cool. 

The atmosphere would’ve been enjoyable if he wasn’t doing an awkward crab pose. Oma seemed to be crouched in a comfortable squat. Shuichi had never felt more envious in his life. Keebo had started the game with them but failed very early on. After getting an almost eternal amount of teasing from Iruma and Oma, he sat sulking on the sofa.

“Hey! Dipshit number one! Right hand red, ya cockroach!” Iruma ordered, she seemed to be very amused to have people obeying her. Given her expression, Shuichi was sure she felt on top of the world right now.

Oma stood up to place his hand on the red circle. Oh god that would mean he’d have to…

“Nishishi, who the hell let that ugly bitch have the spinner!” He complained, bending over Shuichi, their faces becoming uncomfortably close. “Hmm, who’d have thought that I’d be the one on top.” Oma winked, and Shuichi felt as if his arms would give out right there. Be was thankful that this lighting would hide the ugly blush that was probably coating his face.

“Iruma are you even using the spinner?” Keebo grumbled, crossing his arms.

Keade and Rantaro seemed to be more focused on playing on their DS’s than spectating.

Somehow the two competitive boys managed to keep up the game. Iruma stopped pretending to use the spinner and came up with orders on the spot, making the two get into various compromising positions.

“Hey! Iruma. I’m not stupid. I know you’re putting us in sex positions on purpose! And why am I always on top!” Oma whinged. He sounded more irritated at the last part than the first.

Iruma cackled maliciously. “Because! Shuichi would defiantly be the bottom bitch!”

Shuichi could just give up now and save himself the pain of embarrassment that he knew would come back and haunt him for years to come, but the competitive side of him wanted to generally beat Oma, who loved games and bragged about being the master of them.

“Good thing my bodies very flexible. I mean what kind of Supreme leader would I be if I wasn’t physically fit.” Oma said, moving rather elegantly into another stretched position so his head was hanging upside down across from Shuichi. “My flexibility is good for other things too, nishishi.” The said leader grinned, his purple braces glowing in the blacklight.

Shuichi could only huff in response to the other boy’s joke, knowing if he tried to speak it’d come out incredibly strained. Oma seemed to make him flustered on a normal basis never mind up close and personal like this, both breathing deeply and grunting to keep their body weight up. With the added torture from Iruma’s immature humour, Shuichi was finding it more and more difficult to suppress his flustered feelings. 

“You alright there, Mr detective?” Oma asked slyly, seeing the taller boy’s arms tremble.

“Yep.” Shuichi lied poorly, hoping his training with Mamota would pay off. “What about you, no cheating huh?”

“Nope. I always play fair!” Oma replied, leaning closer to Shuichi’s ear, “And I could go all night, Saihara.”

He knew Oma was trying to get to Shuichi to make him lose. The teasing _had_ to be cheating.

“Dipshit number two, left leg green!” Iruma demanded.

That was on the other side of the mat. Shuichi swore he felt his soul leave his body. He attempted to stretch over, somehow managing despite his body stiffly refusing.

“Can you spread your legs any wider?” Oma asked.

“Please! Don’t phrase it like that!” Shuichi pleaded. 

The game seemed to dredge on for a ruthless amount of time, with Iruma laughing manically the whole time. That was until the door flew open with a bang with Mamota and Harukawa entered suddenly. The sudden noise shocked both boys, making them fall atop of one another in a crumpled heap of pain.

\------ 

Kokichi groaned, sitting up after Saihara rolled off him. He tried to look unfazed, although his limbs felt weak from the constant strain of his weight. He wasn’t the strongest despite pretending to be. Then again, he pretended to be a lot of things. 

“Awe man, after all that time and it’s a draw.” He complained, getting up and brushing himself nonchalantly.

After a few more games, this time both Kokichi and Saihara sitting out to rest their sore joints, Amami suggested watching a movie.

Sitting on a wide one-seater with Saihara, Kokichi stretched his legs across the other boy. “Hey, you looked pretty flustered during twister, you sure you’re not playing for the other team, Saihara?” he whispered in a giggle to the detective. Kokichi was beginning to have second thoughts about being forward. It was hard to control his mouth once he started.

“What? No, its not like that. I was just struggling to keep myself up.” Shuichi argued quietly.

Kokihchi could spot a liar easily. Saihara’s tone of voice seemed to indicate that he wasn’t telling the truth. Surly Kokichi was just mistaken, Saihara couldn’t possibly… “Mm, don’t worry your secret is safe with me.” Kokichi teased lightly.

The smaller boy yawned. Twister had truly exhausted him and it was getting late into the night. He closed his eyes and, feeling brave, rested his head on the others chest. After tensing at first, Saihara seemed to welcome him, moving to wrap his hands around the sleepy leader. Kokichi sighed into the others shirt. Perhaps Saeko was right, who’da thunk it. If only it could last, he thought dreamily, closing his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw an image of a twister board in blacklight and this chapter was born. I had fun writing this so I hope it's fun to read. Also I thought Kokichi's braces glowing would look cool idk if brace's can actally do that lol  
> Also next chapter will be more emotional  
> Thanks for reading!


	9. The piano lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi finds something out about Shuichi and the two share a moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh yes im still determined to finish this fic  
> anyways hope you enjoy

Kokichi stirred in the night. A throbbing pain in his back, due to sleeping curled up on the sofa, had awoken him. He squinted looking around, eyes adjusting to the dark. Keebo and Iruma were sleeping top and tailed on the two-seater sofa next to him. Iruma snored obnoxiously while keebo ground his teeth aggressively. What a lovey pair, Kokichi thought to himself sarcastically. Amami was passed out on the floor, looking peaceful. There was no sign of anyone else. Perhaps Keade slept in her own room while the other two were sleeping in a guest room. But that didn’t explain where Saihara had gone, Kokichi thought tiredly.

Quietly stepping over Rantaro’s resting form, Kokichi made his way to the kitchen to scout around. He heard the faint murmur of music from the door across from him. He put his ear to the door to listen closer. A muffled melody of a piano played from the other side.

Kokichi gave in on the urged to knock. As he tapped softly on the door the music came to a halt. Taking this as a sign to come in, he creaked open the door. He came into a small cluttered room. CD and vinyl cases were stakced on shelves and music posters were pasted over the soundproof coated walls. There was a wall of trophies and medals, most likely Akumatsu’s, and a large piano sat in the centre that was pushed snug against the far wall. Saihara was sat on a bench in front of it staring to the door with tired eyes. Kokichi brightened up at the sight of the other, first expecting it to be Akumatsu.

Shutting the door quietly behind him, he looked to the detective and tip toed over without a word, taking a seat on the long bench beside the other. 

“So, you play piano huuh?” Kokichi finally broke the silence.

“Hm, not very well…” Shuichi answered looking at the keys. “Keade taught me a while ago, and well I couldn’t sleep.”

“Yeaah, Iruma snores like a god damn thunderstorm. How about you play me a lullaby to get me all sweeepy.” He said leaning on the thick edges of the instrument.

“Ah, I think I know one soothing song.” Shuichi mumbled in thought.

The taller boy graced his hands over the keys and pushed down softly, beginning the tune. Kokichi watched dreamily as Saihara’s hands danced rhythmically over the keys, elegant and soft, but precise. A calm soothing and almost melancholy melody glided around the room sparking a complex emotion inside Kokichi as he started to feel his eyes grow heavy. Saihara must have been just acting modest about his ability. He sank lower on the side of the piano until his head was lay fully sideways across it.

The music soon faded out and Kokichi opened his eyes not knowing when he had first closed them to begin with. He looked up at Saihara. “What song was that?”

“It’s called Clair De Lune by Debussy” He answered, his face looking slightly, sad?

Kokichi sat up, looking thoughtful. “Hey, do you want me to play you something?”

“You can play?” Saihara asked.

“Of course! I’m a musical genius. I call this one…A masterpiece.” He announced before placing his hands carefully above the keys, then promptly smashing them down in a horrid hurricane of chaotic noise.

Saihara instantly grabbed the smaller boys wrists to restrain him. “Kokichi!” He hissed. “I don’t know how well this roof is sound proofed!” Despite Saihara’s hurried actions the boy chuckled at Kokichi’s ‘attempt’ at playing. 

“Hm well I guess I lied. I can’t play that well. I guess you’re gonna have to teach me?” Kokichi said, crossing his arms.

“You want me to, teach you?” Saihara asked, an amused and surprised expression upon his face.

“Sure! I’m a fast learner, and that’s the truth!”

\------

“Ughh.” Kokichi groaned in frustration, his hand slipping from the key again making the tune fly off key. 

“Don’t worry it’ll take practice. It’s about muscle memory too.” Saihara said. His soothing tone of voice making Kokichi even more flustered.

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Um, try holding your hands like this…” Saihara suggested, placing his hands atop of Kokichi’s to move them in place.

The sudden contact made the smaller boy’s face heat up. Saihara’s hands were larger than his, long and lean. Perfect for playing piano. Kokichi’s fingers where spindly enough but short and his hand strained when reaching certain keys. As Saihara adjusted the others hand, Kokichi noticed the detectives eyes were staring at them profusely. 

Kokichi made a wild guess as to why. “If you’re wondering, the plasters on my fingers are from knife wounds. All accidental of course.”

“They’re from a knife?” Saihara said, turning to the other, concern coating his face. 

Looks like he guessed right. “Yeppers!” Kokichi confirmed. “And that’s not a lie.”

“Why- why do you have knife wounds.” The other asked, sounding distressed. 

Was Saihara seriously worried about him? Kokichi thought then answered with a lie. “I get into a lot of knife fights with other organisation leaders ya know!” 

“well, that has to be a lie.” Shuichi said, his face turning from anxious to unimpressed in a mere sentence.

“Hmm, who knooows. No need to overthink it, detective.” Kokichi teasingly poked the others cheek.

“Hm, yeah. I feel like I’ve been doing that a lot lately.” Saihara chuckled, averting the others gaze.

“Hmm, what about?” Kokichi prodded in response, curiosity getting the better of him.

“Ah its nothing. It’s really not worth-“ 

“Shoot!” Kokichi interrupted.

“Do you not mind?”

“There’s no reason for me to lie about this.”

“Umm, just things with…things with my parents.” Saihara mumbled, his eyes focused on the keys as he prodded one lightly.

“So, you _do_ have the chase of shitty parents. Well I knew that anyways since I can spot a liar easy peasy.” Kokichi accused light heartedly.

“But, they’re not. They just aren’t around a lot and I’m probably just frustrated for no reason.” Shuichi ranted. “Also, that’s not the only thing bothering me, I- I’ve been feeling…weird. Oma, I don’t expect you to answer honestly, but have you ever had a crush before?”

Kokichi willed himself to appear unfazed as much as possible. Why was Saihara asking him of all people. Perhaps it was the detectives sleep deprivation causing him talk about intimate topics that one would never bring up in the day. Did Saihara have a crush? The feeling made Kokichi strangely jealous. This was bad territory, but what kind of liar would he be if he couldn’t traverse this with ease.

“Nah, a supreme leader has bigger fish to fry than boring romance. Why do you ask?” He said, fuelling his curiosity further.

“Ah no reason…” Saihara trailed off.

Kokichi looked at the keys on the piano and saw their fingers were sharing one, almost touching. When did this happen? A strong fragment of him wanted to connect them. To feel the other’s hands again. He hated the way his heart sped up at Saihara’s touch. It shouldn’t be affecting him at all, but his emotions betrayed him. Feeling were hard to fool.

Looking up at the other, Kokichi’s eyes had adjusted to the dim lighting enough to see the details of the boy’s face. Saihara was still staring down, dark long eyelashes gently hooding his eyes, soft faced, lips parted slightly. Stop. Kokichi could just lean in now. He could lean in and kiss him and get all these feeling’s out. Maybe Saihara would abruptly push him away and glare at him with disgust. Maybe he’d reciprocate and kiss back pulling Kokichi closer, but where would that lead to. STOP. Kokichi didn’t even want to be friends with this boy never mind all _this_ that he was thinking. He was metaphorically smacking his brain with a bat in his head at that moment.

“I don’t care if you feel weird,” Kokichi began suddenly. “And you shouldn’t care either. Weird is good. Would you rather be boring? Because I sure wouldn’t.” 

He stops himself before he can say anything else. Kokichi thinks one of the main reasons he didn’t want to be friends with Saihara was that friendship meant sharing things about yourself. He preferred keeping people at an arm’s length, so they were practically strangers. So, he could easily determine what they did and didn’t know about him. It felt safer. This moment with Saihara felt too dangerous. Was there something wrong with him? Why was he suddenly feeling so much empathy towards the other boy?

“Oma?” Shuichi whispered.

Kokichi was tugged out of his spiral of thoughts by the sound of his name. He guessed that he and Saihara both had overthinking in common with one another. 

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.” 

Humming in response, Kokichi leaned slightly towards the other and quirked an eyebrow. “You wanna continue the lesson, _sir_?”

“ _Please_ , don’t call me sir.” Saiahra practically pleaded.

“Oh of course my bad, _master_.”

“Even worse!” 

Kokichi snickered “whatever just teach meee!” he shook Saihara’s arm as the other laughed softly, which sounded like a melody in itself.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! If you have any polite constructive criticism or and suggestion of where you’d like this fic to go please comment it’s really appreciated!


End file.
